moved to heal
movement for healing & resilience

Trauma & Memory

The impact of the unknown

Some people with childhood trauma don’t know that their behaviors, sense of self, and world view are linked to their trauma. They may not have the label “trauma” for their experience, they may not have any words for experiences happening before they had verbal language, and they may have amnesia for all or parts of their traumatic experiences. And yet the trauma lives in their body and behaviors.
Traumatized people feel and act as though their nervous systems have been disconnected from the present.
- from Trauma & Recovery, Herman 1992

How trauma can be obscured

Normal memories are built out of what we experience through our senses, including interoception, and how we process or make sense of that information. A normal memory (built in the hippocampus) includes a narrative (place, sequence) and may or may not have an emotional tone.  We can recall these narrative memories voluntarily and in doing so, we might unconsciously change the memory (a little or a lot) to fit our current needs, sometimes as a function of social connection.

A traumatic memory (built in the amygdala) is, in essence, all emotion, no story -or at best a disjointed one. The processing part doesn’t happen, and your memory is an intense emotional experience of terror associated with specific images, sounds, smells, etc. Traumatic memories are stored to protect you, not socialize you, which means they don’t need to tell a story –just provide a warning. Associated sensory “triggers” can bring back the traumatic memory with the same physiological responses as in the original event to prompt you to take protective measure, irrespective of whether the triggers are actual threats.

Infographic: Normal vs Traumatic Memory

Traumatic memories behave differently than normal memories, coding traumatic experiences in the body and through the senses without a coherent narrative. Trauma memories are recalled without conscious choice; in other words, sense- and emotion-based memories (rather than story-based memories) are triggered by an internal or external factor. Essentially, through implicit memory of trauma, we learn to fear a new threat – the indicators for which could be sounds (e.g., if gunfire was part of the original trauma, gunfire and similar sounds could trigger a traumatic memory), smells, sights, etc. Our brain and nervous system are now wired to react with fear to anything associated with the original trauma because of traumatic memory. And the life-saving lessons (fears) can be passed to our children through our genes, contributing to intergenerational trauma.

This video on epigenetics offers a quick primer on how that’s possible. (MinuteEarth, 2015)

I was listening to the instructor and trying to turn inward and really feel what I was supposed to be feeling and holding the poses. Then all of the sudden, it was really scary. There were a few times that I had body memories to the point where I yelled out in class. It's like a flashback, but you don't have any thoughts or visions that go along with it. So your body-- it's like having a flashback and only having half the story. It made me realize how out of my body I've been all these years and how not attached [I was].
- from Trauma & Recovery, Herman 1992

How we develop a "trauma world view"

Human brains take a long time to fully develop. We don’t come into the world “ready to go,” as it were. Normal brain development occurs in the presence of responsive, attuned caregiving, and with the input of experience to prepare survival in the world as defined by those experiences. Traumatic events trigger the stress responses that help you survive. When we’re in survival mode, our brains/bodies prioritize the resources needed to fight or flee or freeze –all with rapid reaction times. In this state, our brains/bodies don’t prioritize learning, digestion, repair, comfort, or reproduction. When brains develop in a traumatic environment, where survival reactions are needed and the sympathetic nervous system goes into high drive most of the time, stress responses can become the norm in all environments. Usually those look like high-emotion reactions rather than thoughtfully considered decisions, with no pause to confirm the actual danger level of a perceived threat.

Brains, and therefore people, develop and build neural connections based on input from environments and interactions. We learn how to get our needs met through our interactions first with our caregivers and then other adults and peers. When this happens as expected, we develop the ability to manage (reasonable) stress, act on our behalf, and move through the world with a sense of self and self-worth. Instead, negative experiences can shape a child’s brain and create a worldview in which:

  • adults are not trustworthy – impacts a child’s ability to trust adults/people who are trustworthy
  • danger lurks around every corner – impacts a child’s ability to sit still and pay attention to school lessons
Learn more about how experiences affect brain development

When the expected care is disrupted with neglect or abuse or other adverse experiences, those patterns of agency that help us function effectively in relation to others don’t develop. A person’s attempts to regulate their internal experience (perhaps of fear, self-loathing, etc.) can show up in behaviors that function poorly in society: anger, violence, withdrawing, defiant behavior, rejection, bullying, inability to learn or focus, and more.

When trauma is ongoing or recurring, a child’s brain adapts to the experiences and environment as “normal,” creating neural connections and behavioral patterns that help them survive in their surroundings. When they then go into a different environment, one with norms that they haven’t learned and for which they don’t have the physical and mental skills (or current capacity), their behavior is mismatched to their surroundings. Just like “normal” behavior would be mismatched in the traumatic environment they came from. From the perspective of social and developmental norms, many of these adaptations look like “disorders” or “maladaptations”, bringing with them behaviors and internal realities that affect health, learning/productivity, and relationships. And yet, it’s these adaptations that promote survival.

LEARN ABOUT RESILIENCE

trauma affects children

One thing adults fail to do for children is recognize that they have stress… the kids experience traumatic things that may not seem really big to us, but are important to them, and it could hamper their success.
- from "Resilience" movie 
When you are abused you feel small, even smaller than you are. … That was my experience as a child. I wanted to be small and invisible if possible. I wanted not to be seen, and I constricted.… I'd say the sense of being able to open up in this way physically [in yoga], as simple as it sounds, especially the upper part of my body--heart, lungs, diaphragm, shoulders-- all the parts that I had scrunched down, that seemed to make a difference. It allowed an overall expansion. … People are noticing it clearly. I have been invited to do more things. People seem interested in me in a different way. There is something that has changed because people are coming closer to me. I am able to tolerate that better. I am reaching out more in ways that I couldn't have done.
- Research participant, Rhodes 2015

moved to heal

Offering Trauma Center Trauma-Sensitive Yoga in Addison County and online
SCHEDULE A FREE INTRODUCTION
copyright © 2025 esther m palmer
menu